


Knock Knock

by parttimefemmefatale (writingramblr)



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, I'm Not Ashamed, Multi, Tumblr Prompt, or sorry, semi threesome, stripper eight, wrong house stripper au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-21
Updated: 2014-08-21
Packaged: 2018-02-14 01:22:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2172594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingramblr/pseuds/parttimefemmefatale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor is in! But he gets the wrong house and gives Rose and her boyfriend a bit of a surprise.</p><p> </p><p>(Tumblr prompt to beat writers block but i didn't quite have it, but this spoke to me.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Knock Knock

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nenya_kanadka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nenya_kanadka/gifts).



> Originally posted on tumblr
> 
>  
> 
> I wrote this because i was craving smut all day, and because i owe a certain someone Nine/Rose/Eight (although technically the only action between Nine/Eight is major eyefucking *salute* Major Eyefucking )
> 
> annnnd because I’d love to see Paul McGann in a stripper outfit. Scrubs and nothing else but a thong or something...hmmm.
> 
> ahem.
> 
> i even considered using my list idea of a library au and making it straight up eight/nine/ten/eleven/rose buuuut that didn’t happen. it’s an idea for another day.
> 
> not for kids, and not safe for work, DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT…oops i guess i failed that huh?
> 
> enjoy!

A loud knocking startled Rose Tyler from the spot where she knelt on the marble counter of the kitchen, reaching up into a cupboard for a bag of popcorn, and she sighed,

“Can you get that?”

Her current boyfriend, whom she was visiting, shouted back to her from the living room,

“Course I can. But who could that be at this hour?”

It wasn’t terribly late, but at half past eight on a Thursday night, Chris Noble wasn’t expecting company. He wondered if maybe it was a neighbor who’d become locked out. That happened often. It was how he’d met Rose, so he couldn’t say it was a bad thing.

Rose heard the door open, and no noise followed, so she sighed again, and reluctantly climbed down from the counter, cellophane wrapped popcorn in hand, and walked towards the hallway.

“What’s wrong?”

Chris stood with the door open wide, staring at the visitor. Rose fought back a mad urge to laugh, and her hand tightened on the popcorn, making the plastic squeak.

A handsome man with long brown curls, in severe contrast to Chris’ cropped cut, stood in the doorway, wearing a white labcoat, white pants, and no shirt beneath the coat. He had the usual stethoscope around his neck, but also a strange looking flashlight tipped probe in the pocket of the coat. Not just for looking into ears, Rose guessed.

“The Doctor is in…but I think perhaps I have the wrong house?”

Chris glared at the man,

“Yeah mate, I think you do. What the hell is going on?”

Rose smacked Chris and urged the lost looking man inside.

“Come on you can have a drink on us. Do we need to call you a cab or did you drive yourself?”

The man, or as his shiny plastic nametag said, the Doctor, simply shrugged and followed her into the kitchen. Chris was left standing by the open door, which he quickly shut.

“Rose what the hell? You can’t just invite strangers into my house.”

Rose frowned at him,

“He’s not a stranger, he’s a stripper. And he was given faulty directions. Am I right?”

The Doctor nodded, and smiled sheepishly at Chris,

“I’m terribly sorry to inconvenience you. May I borrow your phone?”

Chris was still glaring, and Rose pushed him out of the way, grabbing the landline, and shoving it in the Doctor’s hand,

“Of course you can. I’ll go make that drink. I could use one myself. Forget popcorn love.”

She winked at the Doctor, holding up the still sealed popcorn bag, and tossing it aside. She hoped he’d feel more at ease, after she attempted to diffuse the tension, or testosterone, or whatever was dampening the mood.

However much Chris didn’t trust this Doctor/stripper man, he wasn’t about to leave his girlfriend alone in any case.

She turned around to maneuver in the liquor cabinet and found herself smacking into her boyfriends broad chest. He was half a foot taller than her, so she had to look upwards to pin him with a glare.

“What is the matter with you?”

Chris practically growled at her, and she smirked to herself, she loved it when he got protective,

“That bloke was totally eyeing you up, and I don’t care if he’s at the wrong address, I want him gone straightaway. It’s our date night.”

Rose rolled her eyes at him, and pushed lightly on his chest with her fingertip,

“Down boy. He’s just going to have a drink, and then he’ll be gone. Don’t worry love. You’ve no danger of losing me to a pretty face, when I’ve already got yours to wake up to.”

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on his nose, which some might call overlarge, while she considered it distinctive.

Chris Noble was a man who had a decade of experience on her, and she knew he would never say it, but he worried that she would tire of him, and leave him for someone more suited to her. So he thought. She liked him plenty, probably too much, and she had no desire to be anywhere but in his impeccably organized flat, Doctor or no Doctor.

***

John Smith had never felt dumber in his entire life. First of all, taking the dare his roommate had given him was stupid. Then losing a bet he made over his favorite sports team, the Cybermen, only to have them lose by one point to his roommates team, the Daleks, that was insane.

Now he was stuck at some poor couple’s house, with a dead cellphone, no shirt, and nothing to his name but a fake stethoscope and broken flashlight. Not to mention a handful of condoms in his pants pocket, thanks to his roommate.

How did he really think this would go?

It had gone worse than he could have imagined. He was just grateful that the stunning blonde had come to his rescue. Her tall lanky boyfriend looked about ready to rip him in half. Not to mention the fact he _towered_ over him, he could probably step on him.

The golden haired angel had offered him a drink, and how could he refuse? He called his roommate on their phone, and got no answer. Now he was looking at having to walk home in the ridiculous get up that was his Doctor Stripper outfit. That did not appeal to him. He’d nearly froze on the walk into the apartment building, and lost his dignity around the second flight of stairs.

“Pardon me? Miss?”

The girl turned to him, from where it looked like she and her boyfriend had been in deep discussion, and the way he looked at John made him ready to brave the cold anyway, but she spoke,

“Yes of course. Sorry I’m Rose. Being silly. This is Chris. He’s my mate.”

John stuck out his hand to her, and smiled, before his mind kicked into overdrive at the strange term she used. Mate? As in Soulmate?

“Lovely to meet you Rose. I’m John, but if you’d like to call me the Doctor, I wouldn’t mind.”

Was he blushing? Lord have mercy.

He felt his cheeks heat up when she smiled back, and he saw her none to subtly elbow her ‘mate,’ who eventually reached to shake his hand. It was a crushing grip, and he more than got the message.

“Hands off the blonde.”

Rather childish perhaps, but he wasn’t about to argue, not when he needed to beg another favor.

“Erm, so I got off the phone with my ah, ride, and he’s unavailable, it seems.”

Rose frowned at him, and he found the small crinkles between her eyebrows utterly enchanting. Wrinkles, he reminded himself. Not attractive. But they were.

He was going insane.

***

“Oh dear. Well no worries. You can stay the night if you want, and call a cab in the morning, or take the bus. Or…”

She trailed off and looked up at Chris. He was still glowering, but now he appeared to be trying to communicate without words to her how foolish she sounded.

“I don’t fancy taking the bus in this get up. Frankly, I’m not sure they’d let me on.”

The Doctor smiled apologetically, and Rose felt her heart melt.

“Don’t you worry. I’ll drive you home tomorrow myself. Now come on, let’s have these drinks and get better acquainted.”

He looked so sorry for what he’d done, which seemed to be no fault of his own, and Rose was getting pretty annoyed at Chris for being such a daft git to him.

It only took a few glasses of cherry vodka for Rose to dissolve into a giggling mess, and Chris was hardly much better.

The Doctor seemed to be strangely immune to the alcohol, but still looked so lost and left out.

“Where’d you get such sad eyes?”

Rose asked him, her words only slightly slurred.

His wide blue eyes were a shade lighter than Chris’ but just as beautiful, and she found herself looking at them, and became so entranced she missed his reply.

“Roooose, pay attention to me.”

Chris whined, and she smacked his arm.

“No. m’Listening to the Doctor. Sorry what did you say Doctor? Chris was jabbering and I missed it.”

She grinned lazily, and ignored the mock glare Chris sent her.

He wasn’t about to admit that he was having a nice time, a nicer time than usual on their date night. Turned out their strange gatecrasher was on his way to becoming a doctor of sorts, of…

“What did you say you did?”

The Doctor sighed, and looked over at Rose, who was pulling his lab coat absentmindedly, baring more of his chest than he felt comfortable with.

“Um…psychology.”

“You are just too pretty. It’s not fair. You’re a man, and your hair is nicer than mine. Look at these waves Chris. Why doesn’t my hair do that?”

She stuck her hands in his hair, without much warning, and her fingers tugged gently on his curls.

Chris was about to make a smart remark about how her hair _did_ do that, but then he noticed the look on the Doctor’s face. Like a cat who’s just been scratched behind the ears.

His eyes rolled back into his head, and he moaned.

Rose gasped and pulled back.

“Oh my god. I’m sorry, did I hurt you?”

The Doctor shook his head, and reached out to grab her hand, lacing their fingers together,

“No Rose. It felt so good. But I need to you to stop. You have to go, leave me alone. Forget me. I’ll be gone in the morning before you wake up.”

Chris looked as if he heartily approved of this, but Rose shook her head in return.

“No way. How could I forget you? This?”

She gestured towards him, and Chris was sure he could see the bloke blushing.

“I’m not that memorable.”

Rose shifted until she was looking right at him, and her hands were braced on his thighs,

“Wanna bet?”

She leaned forward, and kissed him.

***

Chris wasn’t sure why he was still watching, and not threatening to beat the Doctor to a pulp, or yanking Rose away. But he had promised her forever, and he never said they couldn’t experiment. Maybe that was why he found himself liking the way she took charge, like a natural, climbing into the Doctor’s lap, yanking his lab coat off, and roaming his bare chest with her hands, all the while their lips never separated.

Rose might be drunk a bit out of her mind, but the Doctor wasn’t protesting.

When her hands moved back up to fist in his hair, Chris saw the Doctor’s hands tighten on her waist.

“Rose.”

One word, infinite questions, and when Rose pulled away to look at him, he saw the gleam in her eye, and she smiled at him,

“Yes love?”

“Should we?”

He jerked his head towards their bedroom, and Rose bit her bottom lip, nodding.

“Yeah. Come with us?”

Rose laced her fingers through the Doctor’s hand, and despite his shell shocked expression, he quickly followed along the hall to the bedroom.

Chris had a king bed, only because he insisted he needed space to spread out while he dreamed, and Rose had never appreciated it more than in that instant.

She tugged on the Doctor’s hand and led him into the room, before nodding at Chris to shut the door behind him.

The Doctor was already half naked, and Rose suspected that he probably didn’t have much on beneath his white pants. The faux seams on the side suggested she was right. When she pulled at the zipper on the front, the whole front half of his pants came off in her hand.

She giggled, and threw them aside.

“Guess we don’t need those.”

The Doctor nodded, and shrugged,

“Unless you think we could use what’s in my pockets?”

Chris had caught the offending garment, and was surprised to find it bursting with condoms. He lifted an eyebrow at them both, and Rose giggled harder.

Despite his apprehension at the entire situation, he couldn’t keep himself from noticing how her breasts moved with the sweet sound.

She’d only thrown on some jimjams, which consisted of a pair of his boxer shorts, and one of his jumpers, the entirely more efficient way to segue into sex after the film, he thought.

But now, it just helped everything along.

He practically matched her, except he wore an additional layer of black cotton pants over his boxers. His excuse was that it was to keep him warmer than her, for she was always cold.

The Doctor began to ease the jumper over her chest and Chris coughed.

All movement halted, and two pairs of eyes turned to him.

“I’ll undress my girl friend, thanks very much.”

Rose rolled her eyes, but moved towards him without a word of protest. She understood his macho possessiveness, and she wasn’t going to waste breath and energy arguing.

The Doctor watched, wide eyed as Chris peeled off the dark maroon jumper from Rose, revealing her breasts quickly, and a stomach he couldn’t wait to kiss down…before, well, if Chris would let him.

She returned the favor and yanked off Chris’ emerald green jumper without much resistance.

She grinned widely at his bared chest. Her hands knew every inch of his skin, but she wasn’t sure she’d ever tire of seeing it with her own eyes, rather than just from memory. When Chris let her leave the lights on as they undressed, she relished every second.

The Doctor was feeling a bit abandoned, but as soon as Rose shucked off her borrowed boxer shorts, his mouth went dry, and he couldn’t remember what he was going to complain about.

“Your turn.”

She purred and crept to his side, pushing him back onto the mattress, and tugging at the white briefs that were the only item of real clothing he wore.

He was embarrassed at how hard he was, and he knew it had been from the second he’d laid eyes on her. No matter the scare tactics of her mate, she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen, and he thanked any and all gods that were, that this was even happening to him.

The catalyst had probably been when she’d stroked his hair, and he’d practically moaned like some horny teenager.

Judging by the look on Chris’ face, perhaps he _had_ moaned aloud. But when Rose touched him, with a warm and dry hand, he didn’t hold back a sound.

“God he’s gorgeous.”

Rose whispered, and maybe it was to herself, but Chris nodded, and as he slipped his hands around her waist, fingers inching close to her throbbing wet center, she shivered.

“You’re both gorgeous. How’d I get so lucky?”

Chris growled, right beside her ear, and she arched back against him, feeling his arousal rub against her,

“This had nothing to do with luck. This was fate.”

“Mmm I love it when you talk like that.”

The Doctor was too far gone to really listen to the two murmuring sweet nothings, and when Rose moved down to lick his chest, inches from his left nipple, he’d moaned again, and just realized how easily aroused he was. He’d never experimented with his own nipples, but he knew they had a marvelous effect on women’s arousal.

Rose was now eye level with his cock, now approaching degrees of pain, and then she kissed it. Just the tip, but the change in sensation made him grip the sheets tightly.

“Oh he likes that. Don’t you Doctor?”

She was talking to him, but when she stopped, and her lips swallowed him deeper than he’d have imagined, he couldn’t think of a clever reply.

Chris smacked her ass and she hummed, sending vibrations through the Doctor’s cock, and driving him dangerously close.

Rose was beginning to become less dizzy and more aware of things, and the second Chris’s palm touched her skin, she was more than ready for him.

“May I love?”

Chris asked her, his voice a low whisper, and she knew how much he was holding back. His hands hovered over her lower back and ass, and she pulled away from the Doctor’s cock to nod.

His palms squeezed her cheeks, before he sheathed himself inside her with one perfect thrust.

Rose gritted her teeth at the sensation, and returned her attentions, as best she could, to the Doctor. He lay panting on the sheets, and his precum was beginning to drip onto his bare chest.

She knew she’d tortured him enough.

“Pretty boy, come for me.”

She winked at him, and leaned back down to take him in her mouth, watching his face, as she licked and sucked just enough, and she felt him shudder beneath her.

“Oh my gods…”

The Doctor knew Chris was right. He had to be. No one was this lucky. Fate had brought them together. He finally came down from the high of his orgasm, just in time to see Rose reach hers.

It was quite fulfilling to watch her face, the skilled seductive expression fell away for an instant, as her eyes squeezed shut and she gasped wordlessly.

Chris was clearly used to such a silent display, and he locked eyes with the Doctor when he came.

The man was a machine, but clearly in love with his golden girl.

***

John didn’t protest when Rose cuddled up to him afterwards, and told him that the couch was rubbish, and he was much too comfy to be let go of.

He was grateful that she separated him from Chris, as he was afraid he might accidentally find himself strangled in the middle of the night.

Rose stroked his forehead, and her fingers smoothed the sweaty curls from out of his face, and he fell asleep as if he’d dived into an Olympic swimming pool.

Chris only was able to sleep when Rose took his hand in hers, and squeezed his hand gently, whispering,

“Thank you for what you did.”

“Didn’t do much.” He replied gruffly, and she laughed, a silent shaking of her shoulders, mindful of their bedmate,

“You were able to let go. Just a little. Don’t worry so much. I love you. You’re my mate.”

“As you are mine.”

Rose smiled to herself, and snuggled against the pillow, content between her two lovers.

***

**END**

**Author's Note:**

> and as noted in the tags on tumblr, i brought up condoms, but rose and nine don't use them cause they're exclusive and as for this time i have no idea. if it bothers anyone, i'm sorry.  
> but #fanfic


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